self worth

i feel like money.

last time 20 cents one bowl of noodles. now, people wont even turn back to pick up a 20 cent coin they drop on the floor.

but money is void of emotion. it has no will or preference or love.

i. i am an individual. i cant take it that im treated like that 20 cent coin.

pardon me. but i think i deserve better.

- .... .. ... / .. .... / -- --.- / .... - .- - . -- . -. - / --- -.-- / -.-- .- .. - ....

God, you ARE my value. i am worth what you say im worth.

i look to you my source and my provider.

i basically need to know in my heart that i mean enough to someone.

ming

ready for sea

So im back for my VA. i have total of 10 weeks here. its been 3 weeks already and i do indeed feel like i have learned so much.

i was just thinking, in the case of a physical war, when are we ready to fight a physical war? when are we truly "operationally ready"?

many times i feel we place much emphasis on being ready in terms of equipment, processes and technology. but is that all there is?

We are ready for war not when our systems are ready, but when our men are willing to fight.

i need to ponder this more..

i dont even konw

its so hard to carry on without reciprocation.

its like paying for food, but not being served any.

its like trying to clapping your hands, but there is no sound.

its like cooking a meal, and no one appreciates.

its like giving your heart, but no one's receiving it.

time crunch

when 24 hours is not enough

what do you cut back on?

that is what is TRULY unimportant to you.

all the other bull you talk during fair weather is useless.

Be my source, be my hope

Be my only one.

the words to the song that im writing

time after time i have fallen short of your glory

yet your agape has never failed to restore me

i fall down before your throne because i'm unworthy

yet you take this act and call it worship

how amazing: the miracle of salvation

how amazing: Christ was the solution

forever i will live for Your glory and praise

be it far from me that i should ever walk away

deliver me from my sin and my shame

as i sing this song, i want to never be the same

how amazing: You're renewing my mind

how amazing: i'll bow down to lift your name high

rev 15

great and marvelous are your deeds, Lord God Almighty

just and true are your ways, King of the ages.

Who will not fear you, O Lord, and bring glory to your name?

For you alone are holy

All the nations will come and worship before you,

for your righteous acts have been revealed.

from a post in 08

there is a tree planted by streams of water
the tree works hard to try to keep the wet soil from eroding away
he blames the stream for his tiredness and all
only to realise,
the stream gives him strength to keep everything together.

reflections in a glass of water

Reflections on 21 days.

i was praying that God would save mamakongkong (maternal grandma and grandpa).

that God would grant me a new tongue.

for various people and their families.

first and third nothing yet.

but 2, which is personal, OMGSH, i think God has granted it to me! just realised it today when praying before worship at Megalife. when i was praying for myself and stuff, it was shurabasekaetaerama (something like that) but when i was interceding for megalife it was kiyalalala basekaerlalala (something like that!) and it was completely natural! happened on a few other ocassions too just that i didnt get a chance to realise that one was warfare kind, the other was more building up kind! the building up kind being the new one! (:

awesome!

other than that, i feel my heart is revived. its like ive realised that my ministry is not to tell people to Go. my ministry is first and formost to GO! it is my responsibility to shake up the place God has put me in.

i feel a burning desire to look outward and not inward.

im itching to let people know that there is more to life! that there is hope and grace and salvation!

hearing abby share on church at work really struck a chord in my heart! i want in on that!

hearing joyee share about her street e with her sec 1s. 11 salvations! how awesome is that!!!

Lord! open up the heavens and pour out a mighty rain!

Reflections on leadership

sometimes i really have no idea what to do!

oh God give me wisdom!

you placed me here, your word you threw at me.

i received it, ive obeyed it.

now i think its fair for me to demand that you PLEASE HELP ME.

i cant do this on my own,

this burden of leadership give me strength to hold

your sheep, your loves, i dare not take lightly

this call, i pray is truly Yours.

Reflections on life

i feel like at ostrich sometimes.

fast, strong.

but im a bird that cant fly.